Showing posts from February, 2020

Just Keep Swimming

Have you ever stopped to think how brilliant Dory is? You know, Dory from Finding Nemo. If you forgot her she would understand. She had this motto that work wonders no matter what you face. Good things happen to us in life. Bad things happen in life. Frustrations happen. Setbacks. Losses. Wins. Through all of it, you really need to "Just Keep Swimming."

When things are going well for you, it is easy to get lazy with what got you there. You need to keep improving, keep getting better. You need to "Just Keep Swimming."

When things aren't going well for you, it is easy to give up. Setbacks don't define you. Most people will tell you out of their greatest defeats led to something even better. Learn from it and move forward. You need to "Just Keep Swimming."

Life will throw all kinds of craziness your way. Whatever happens, good or bad, "Just Keep Swimming."

In Most Situations, How You Feel Doesn't Matter

I was listening to episode 80 of the Jocko Podcast and they were talking about being able to detach. This isn't about detaching as in pulling away and not interacting with another human being. It is about being in a heated situation and not getting caught up in the moment, keeping your cool to make rational decisions. Granted Jocko is a decorated Navy SEAL who later in his career was in charge of training new SEALs. He has been in engagements that make whatever your situation is trivial. The skill is useful to all of us even though we will likely never be in a combat situation.
One of the best examples Jocko talked about was whenever his kids are fighting, he instantly detaches and steps in. He doesn't get emotional, he doesn't yell at his kids to stop fighting or else. He calmly steps in, assess the situation, gathers the facts and details needed, and quickly makes a decision. 
Haven't we all been in a situation where we loose our cool? We look back on a situation and…

Having Hope When Things Look Hopeless

There are times when things look utterly hopeless. You are exhausted and feel like there is no way out of a situation you are in. In those times we need to remember there is always hope. There are always choices and alternatives to consider. There are more options and you have more control than you think you do. When I start to feel hopeless in a situation, I remind myself it is an emotional response and I try to focus harder on non-emotional aspects. What are the facts of this situation? How can I logically think through the options?
We are blessed with having both a heart and a head. We need to recognize when one is doing more work than the other and things are out of balance. A few ways I have learned for myself that help me: Make a list of all of the options/choices available. No matter how extreme or off the wall they are. An option always available, no matter the situation, is to sell everything and move to an island in the Caribbean. That option has never been selected, but just…

Success Is One Step Forward

I recently hit a milestone at work, I was a part of launching my first project, it was a great feeling after 232 days, not that I was counting. Is that success? The client said it was one of the smoothest launches they had been a part of. Is that success? I haven't been laid off from my job yet. Is that success?
I know I talk a lot about success, and how we can all find more success. I am always looking for the little tips and ideas to find every 0.0001% I can find in every area of my life to be a better employee, teammate, father, and husband. When we are striving for better we are finding success. Getting better, finding ways to improve in every little way will lead to success. People will always have different definitions of what success looks like, to me success is showing forward progress. 
When you think about failure it isn't about the first mistake, it is about repeating the mistake and never correcting enough to show forward progress. The rookie on the team isn't …

Your Expectations Are Probably Going To Be Met

Expectations have been on my mind lately so I started doing some searching looking for quotes. I was amazed, most of the quotes coming up first had a very similar tone:
No expectations, no disappointments.The secret of happiness is low expectations.When you have expectations you are setting yourself up for disappointment. It made me sad. I get I can't expect to play for the winning Super Bowl team next year. But to have expectations so low, basically expecting nothing good is going to happen will almost guarantee nothing good will happen.

I believe what you expect is likely what will happen. Realistic expectations are always good, but if you expect that people will disappoint you, that is likely what you will see, all of the areas they disappoint you. If you expect people to do great things, to surprise you, to exceed your expectations, you will see all the ways they do.

The definition of expectation is a strong belief that something will happen or be the case in the future. Anothe…

Swimming Through Life's Troubled Waters

Sometimes things suck. If anyone told you life was going to always give you exactly what you wanted they were lying. You get a bad grade on your test, the project you are working on doesn't go smooth, people you thought were your friends talk about you behind your back. The cliched answer is you win some you learn some. Everything we see as a loss is really just a learning opportunity.

Speaking for myself every time something major happened in my life that most would consider to be a loss, eventually things turned around into something positive. The cliche is unfortunately true, what seemed like losses were my best learning opportunities. I learned more about myself, grew more, and figured out what was important in life by some of the biggest "loses".

As you learn more about yourself, you also discover that our greatest enemies in life are not other people. Our enemies are the doubts, fears, apprehension, mistrust and other harmful self talk in our own minds. We can eith…

Throwing Stones And Catching Eggs

We all know, if you live in a glass house you shouldn't throw stones. This is not a good analogy for how the world actually works. Yes, we all live in brittle glass houses, as the imperfect beings we are. But it isn't as simple as not throwing stones like we are a starting pitcher for the Yankees. We are going to get stones thrown our way, some intentionally, but like a rock hitting your windshield sometimes the circumstances are just right. If you've ever been cut from a team, lost a job, or been given some critiques on things you can do better, it isn't hard to feel like big stones aimed right at you.
The fact is sometimes we need to be told things aren't good or need to be improved. It is easy to avoid having hard conversations because you don't want to throw stones. But it doesn't help the other person improve. I always tell people if they see something that I can do better, I want to know. It sucks to hear but I can't improve things unless I know a…

The Weakest Yet Most Beautiful Part

I'm no geologist, but I have heard with stone like granite and marble you often find the prettiest and most interesting patterns are also likely the weakest point in the stone. I'm guessing there have been some people, out shopping for a new counter top, if they've heard this concept they decide to be smart and select the one that has fewer weak points. Unfortunately they have also selected the most boring stone on the lot.

Yes, that stone has a weak spot, but it is still stone. It is still going to be durable and do what you probably need it too. If you accept the one with some more weak spots you also get something far more colorful and intriguing.

Everything and everyone has weak spots. These weaknesses make life interesting. The trials or challenges that we face and survive. The stresses that build character. These elements build up a beautiful picture. Yes, they might be your weakest point, but they build a far more interesting picture of who you are.

While it may fee…