In Most Situations, How You Feel Doesn't Matter

I was listening to episode 80 of the Jocko Podcast and they were talking about being able to detach. This isn't about detaching as in pulling away and not interacting with another human being. It is about being in a heated situation and not getting caught up in the moment, keeping your cool to make rational decisions. Granted Jocko is a decorated Navy SEAL who later in his career was in charge of training new SEALs. He has been in engagements that make whatever your situation is trivial. The skill is useful to all of us even though we will likely never be in a combat situation.

One of the best examples Jocko talked about was whenever his kids are fighting, he instantly detaches and steps in. He doesn't get emotional, he doesn't yell at his kids to stop fighting or else. He calmly steps in, assess the situation, gathers the facts and details needed, and quickly makes a decision. 

Haven't we all been in a situation where we loose our cool? We look back on a situation and you realize you let your emotions take control. We get lost in the moment and wish we could go back now that we've had a chance to think it over. Wishing there was a way to take a mulligan. It is those times that you say something you later regret.

Being able to detach doesn't mean that you don't care, it doesn't mean you slow down to a snails pace to gather all of the details. I can only imagine what it is like as a Navy SEAL, there are moments that you absolutely cannot go slow, but charging into a situation without all the details can get your men killed. 

If you find yourself feeling angry, frustrated or annoyed by different situations, recognize it is an emotion and it is an opportunity to detach. How you feel about different situations does very little to actually bring about changes. Don't make the problem worse by letting emotions cause you to react in a way you are going to end up regretting.



Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What A Little Kindness Can Do

Image
I was at the grocery store recently and I had the opportunity to help a lady who had her hands full put her cart away, it literally took less than ten seconds of my time. I walked away thinking about how good that smile and thank you felt. I realized something about myself that I hadn't ever really given much thought to, how much I like being kind to others. I don't know how much of an impact it really has on a persons life, but I hope that in a world with so much negativity that I can make a small positive impact. If you think of your own life, I imagine you can think of some random acts of kindness that someone did to you, and most importantly you remember how it made you feel. I had to make an appointment one time and the receptionist made a comment about getting things setup with the important person, and I told her that she was the most important person right now because without her I wouldn't get an appointment. I imagine that she has a difficult job at times, deali
Read more

Don't Let The Perfect Be The Enemy Of The Good

Image
I've heard this saying a number of times recently, in a variety of formats. I like the version that is attributed to Voltaire mostly because I like pretending to be smart by quoting Voltaire. There are too many times we don't like to move forward because we don't have all of the information, haven't covered all of the scenarios, or feel like we don't have all of the experience we need. We don't apply for our dream job because we feel like we don't have the experience needed or are simply afraid of being told we aren't right for the position. We don't want to start writing because we feel like there are lots of other writers that are much better than us. The part we never see is the countless hours of practice and bad writing that happened to become better, to be the writer we see today. Everyone starts out as a novice, a beginner. You can still make music even if you aren't Mozart. You can still write even if you aren't Shakespeare. You
Read more

Just Keep Swimming

Image
Have you ever stopped to think how brilliant Dory is? You know, Dory from Finding Nemo. If you forgot her she would understand. She had this motto that work wonders no matter what you face. Good things happen to us in life. Bad things happen in life. Frustrations happen. Setbacks. Losses. Wins. Through all of it, you really need to "Just Keep Swimming." When things are going well for you, it is easy to get lazy with what got you there. You need to keep improving, keep getting better. You need to "Just Keep Swimming." When things aren't going well for you, it is easy to give up. Setbacks don't define you. Most people will tell you out of their greatest defeats led to something even better. Learn from it and move forward. You need to "Just Keep Swimming." Life will throw all kinds of craziness your way. Whatever happens, good or bad, "Just Keep Swimming."
Read more